Winter

Well wow, finally finally finally got to spend time with my bf Matt and let me tell ya, it was better than ever. I am really glad that we had time to spend together. And i just have to say that he is really great. I really couldnt ask for anyone more, and im so much happier now that we have spent time together.

And im excited that over break he will only be 30mins away most of the time. Well except for the fact that he is going to Hawaii for Xmas and a bowl game to watch Notre Dame. And yes im jealous that i cant go cause i have family stuff. Booooo. But i guess i cant complain since im going to NYC for New Years. So really i cant blame him too much. I just wish the i could be with him in both places. It would be amazing.

But i still think it would be great to be with him at both places at once. So winter break should be good.

Roommate

So i figured that i would update this issues with what happened with my roommate.

Just so ya all know this happened a few weeks back

Well it all started when i was half woken up by a violent pounding on the door, when i opened the door a pretty big guy standing there in a uniform asked if i was my roommate i told him no hes not here right now and almost shut the door. He said we have a search warrant and asked if he could come in and search the room. It was at this time that i noticed his badge and the rest of his uniform, and then saw the he was framed by the woman cop standing behind him, i mean the woman pretty much had to duck to get thru the door. And then behind both of them the Hall Director who looked confused as to what was going on.

I asked what the warrant was pertaining to and they said that it had to deal with my roommate and something that he had gotten himself into. Since i knew that they couldnt have taken anything of mine i let them in, and when to ask the HD what was really going on, they said it shouldnt take long and i asked if i could get my computer out of the room to work on my project, but they said they couldnt let me do that. I was left in the hall talking to the HD with just the remote to the tv the clothes i had on and thats it. I had no shoes, no wallet, no phone, no keys nothing.

They were done about 35-40 mins later, i know wont take long my ass, but then they asked me a billion a two questions about my roommate, most of them they same ones. How often do you see your roommate, how often do you talk to him, when was he last here, do you see him a lot, when was the last time you saw him. After a few of these, i told them, honestly he hasnt slept here for the past 3 weeks, and when he is here it only for a few mins, and then he is gone again, i have no idea who his friends are, where he goes, at this point im prob sure that you know more than i do.

So then they left me when a room they had just turned upside down and the warrant. Well of coarse i read what they took. They reported finding a gun clip with six bullets in it. a prescription bottle with his girl friends name on it. and then a revolver and a box of ammo. So i was pretty sure the my roommate was not coming back anytime soon. And since it said he was under suspicion for breaking into a High School and stealing $16,000 worth of band instruments

Well i txted him to be nice, to let him that the cops stopped by with a warrant and what they took, only to a few hours later get a txt that he has been arrested. So i was pretty sure at that point that he was really not coming back.

Well to my amazement two days later he showed back up, and said that he spend two days in jail, the two longest days of his life. Tired to get a hold of his parents, but since he is older than 18 they didnt have to call his parents for him. Finally his parents found out thru the news the he had been arrested, and sent a bail bonds man to get him out, $10,000 bail. He was trying to sort stuff out with the College so he could finish the semester and at least get the grades. But then he called me back and said that he was not allowed to even be on College Property so he was sending someone to get some of his stuff.

So his friend picked up some of his stuff, a few weeks later i boxed up the rest of his stuff, and later that week his dad came and picked it up. and he was gone for good this time. Well now i have a new roommate, and he is a good guy, and the rest of the floor likes him as well so i think things will work out next semester.

Finally My New Tattoo and Piercing

So i finally did it, i got my first tattoo.

I have to admit that i was nervous about the pain that i might have to go thru. Thought i was going to freak out when he turned the gun on and i heard the sound but i didnt, i was really ok with that. Then he started and it really wasnt that bad as i thought it would be. Even tho it really wasnt that bad, it did hurt at times, but only in certain spots when he was going deeper with the ink. Ya when he had the smaller needle it did hurt a bit more, and i did wince but ya know pain is expected. But as soon as the area went numb then it was ok. but if he moved to a different spot then it hurt again. But i got it done and it turned out awesome i have to say, better than i could have asked for.

As for the pircing in my ear i did get the industrial and i was thinking that it would be about the same amount of pain that i had when i got the other one, but ya that wasnt true. When i saw the hollow needle that he was going to shove thru my ear, i was like HOLY CRAP THATS A BIG NEEDLE!!!!!! but i went thru with it anyway, and it hurt, ALOT, more so than the tattoo i would say, and i almost had him just leave the first hole, but i just had him keep going. The second one was bad and it hurt, but ya i just put up with it.

So here are some pics of the new additions

Winter

Well its December now, which makes me think its really winter now.

And its the Christmas Season now, which is great, one of my fav times of the year.

But ya, have to say these next weeks are going to be crazy, seems like everything is going to go on.

Home Visit
Party
Studio
More Studio
Tattoo
Piercing
Maybe Home Again
Finals
Xmas Presents
And still normal classes on top of it all.

It should be an exciting and busy few weeks. I hope to get everything done in time.

Ill update about how everything goes.

As well as i have stories to tell. But i have to inform my friends of them first. So you all will have to wait for now.

Gah

Dammit i need some physical contact already. Gah.

That with craziness going on, ill talk about that later, maybe.

After Math of a Crazy Weekend.

It has been a truly crazy past four days,

From my roommate getting in trouble with the law
The room being searched and turned upside down
Talking to the Police, RAs, and Hall Directors because of this fact
Having a Design Charrette for studio
Having People come to visit this weekend
Going to a midnight showing when i had to wake up early the next day
Going to a party, and just going Crazy while i was there.
Getting sick the next day, right before the second part of the charrette
Having the roommate come back, and then getting kicked off campus
Having to put everything together before break

All of this just mainly this weekend, it been all sorts of crazy.

Tattoos and Piercings

So i have been thinking more and more about tattoos and maybe getting my ear pierced again. As well as maybe get my lip pierced who knows. As well as getting one of my tattoos.

But as for my ear piercing, i was thinking about an industrial.














And then for my tattoos, the first one that i want is the wooden cross with a crown of thorns around the top and three nails laying at the bottom of the cross, the would go on my right shoulder, Ill upload the pic of it soon.


Next is a dragon fighting a tiger, and i want this on my side, ya ya i know what your gonna say, 'thats really gonna hurt' well somethings in life hurt. And since this represents the inner conflict i think that its ok that it hurts.









Next is an anatomically correct heart which will be over my heart, this is for person reasons. And only certain people will know what it really is for.











So thats all for now just something to think about

Council Is Out for Debate.

So its that time again, counciling time, and for those who dont know yes i go to counciling. Mainly cause my mom said i had to, apparently she thinks its going to fix something. Ya ya thats a whole another story for some other time.

But ya talking about everything caused stress for the councilor, Joe, mainly we talked about the family thing, about how i cant talk to my family about me being gay at all, its just like ignore it when im at home. And how at this point that i could not take a guy that im dating home. And im not sure that will change anytime soon. And how im pretty much living two different lives where i can be myself, and another where i dont show any aspects of being gay. As well with that, trying to find a way where being gay, who i am, and find a way to also be with God. To me thats trying to fit a square peg into a round hole, it doesnt work so well, and for those people who say well just choose one, thats like saying which arm do you want to cut off, your left or your right???? So if you can easily choose which arm you would like to live without for the rest of your life, then let me know. Other wise you have no idea what its like. The constant back and forth of what to think, what to do. Never being sure.

Ya these kinds of things arent easy. So sorry if you think they are, i have to say that they arent. And yes it would be sooooo much easier if i werent gay but its not something i can flip like a switch, its part of me, something i really cant change.

Ya so i stressed out Joe today, mainly cause he can believe that im dealing with all of this at once, and im just trying to take it one day at a time. Just one day at a time, thats how i deal with it. And try to ignore the whole issue with my parents. Im going to try to work something out, so i can be ok with it, as well as my parents, if that means ignoring the subject when im around them thats fine i just need to know.

The Ten

So a friend and i were bored and decided to make a list of celebs that we like, ya ya i know that its usually just ten but it havent narrowed it down yet.

So in no particular order....

Gerald Butler

Daniel Craig

Bruce Willis

David Tennant

John Barrowman

Bob Harper

Justin Chambers

James Denton

Justin Bartha

Kenny Chesney

Hugh Jackman

Edward Norton

And thats the list, ya ya i know its really 12 and not 10 working on cutting a few out.

One Month Check In

So its been one month and its been a pretty quick month, With everything from going to the west coast for a week, to having studio get busy, getting sick, going home for fall break, dropping a stressful class, and family weekend. Its just been crazy. I have an amazing guy. I kinda feel bad that i havent been able to give him much of my time.

I feel like i should be able to give him more of my time, but sometimes i just cant. And feel like its not fair to him. I do feel bad about it just not sure how to fix it right now.

But life is good life is returning to normal and the fact that things are getting less stressful, well at least a bit, is always a good thing.

On Cloud Nine

So im on cloud nine right now, its official, i am now in a relationship. The most amazing guy, i have no idea why he thinks the same of me, but he does. He is great and we are BFs now. Its great. But ya i was nervous at first about asking since it seemed early but it just felt right. dont know how to explain it at all. But it just did. It feels great.

Fresh air, when everything else is toxic

Well i wasnt expecting something like this to happen at all, i wasnt really looking for anything. But it just happened, what was i spose to do, run the other way??? I dont think so. He gives me those butterflies, not just the kind that flutter, the kind that go CRAZY, and he makes me blush. Not many guys can do that, not many at all. We both have been falling fast, but what to take things slow, and know each other. And for once i feel really happy, truely happy.

But at the same time that good has been happening, i have hurt others, and im sorry for that, i should have stopped i should have seen what was happening with them, i guess i really didnt care that much. but he needs time to heal right now, even if i did tell him up front what was happening, its still my fault. I really want to introduce him to some other guy that i could possible see it working out with him. But i should have stopped things long ago.

Gah, i guess the good comes with the bad.

Where's My Mail Order Knight?

Is it possible to be jealous of a fictional relationship? seriously. Gah, right now i just need someone who is more than a friend to just lay with and take a nap, just once, that would be great. i would feel sooooo much better after that.

I dont know why im just kinda blah right now, ill get over it, but it would be nice to have someone just for a night even to just be close to. Dont even care about the whole sex thing. Just closeness, physical closeness and i would be ok with that.

Meh its prob me just being stupid right now. Pretty sure that i have overloaded my system, having been trying to do a few too many thing in the past week. I seem to do that, for not doing a lot, i still try to do it all. Even if i dont have time for it. Seems to have been catching up with me, sleeping right thru my alarm, i usally at least wake up turn it off and then go back to sleep. Nope not this time. Gah stupid system being overloaded.

It would be nice to have that closeness, and do nothing for a day, except watch tv drink some juice and be close to that person who is missing. no talking, no nothing, just juice, tv and being close. that would be a nice reset day for me.

Dating?

Hmmmm well i guess it has started, still not sure about it, but what have i 100% certain about until it happened? Really not too much.

So i have started to date a few people. The first is "Flirt" from a while back, well i guess the first official date is this weekend. He is still more of a friend tho, not sure what is going to happen there. And at the same time that i dont want to hurt him in the end. Gah just dont know what i have done here, i see a big disaster happening, mainly cause of my part of it all.

The next is "EB" and we knew each other from last year and kinda talked, and i knew he was pretty much gay, he wasnt ready to come out yet tho. and im just a person to talk to mainly, we just go grab some food and talk, we haven't even been flirting with each other, and if you know me, you know that is almost impossible for me. I guess its cause he is just getting into this whole thing, and is really new to it all, not sure what to do.

Gah

Well see what happens

Getting back into the Swing of things

So school has been going on for a while now. And i have to say its been nice being back at school even with my Ex being here, we had a talk, and now im trying to be nice and civil. At least try harder to be, i have been hearing that he has had a hard time because of what happened with us, not really my wish, so ill try not to make it so hard for him. Which means i should be a good boy and not do anything at all. But i feel like having some fun this year.

I have already started to have some fun this year, and its great. Nothing to hardcore, but just some laided back fun, trying to fill my time slots so im not just sitting on my butt all the time. When i do that i feel like im wasting time almost, i feel like i have to do something, if i could just skip sleep that would be great, there is just never enough time in the day. Well see how things are going in a bit.

Thats all for now.

Fresh Start

Time for year 3 at college, where has the time gone?

Well still not sure about much, except that i still fall for the wrong guys. The ones that i know will have a very hard time working out. So that means, that yes, im still looking for my Ianto Jones. And if ya dont know what im talking about, its called google. But it would be nice, but really i dont want to rush anything, that shouldnt be.

Hmmmm well who knows, still open right now. Who knows what this year holds. Hopefully something good can come from this year. At least hopefully better than the last 2 years.

Thats about all for now, ill keep ya all updated.

Am i missing out?

So i now know that i have bad timing, Johny is now in a relationship yes i know, i have bad luck right now.

Yes i do feel like i am missing out on something, mainly a relationship. Even tho im not sure if im ready for one yet. i guess i just want to leave my options open right now. Hmmmmm im just all sorts of confused right now.

Who knows.

A Crack in the Support

I try
Try to stand up
There with no support
None to hold me up

All the support is gone right now.
None close, all far away
No support to fall on

Falling thru air
And having no one there
No one to catch me as i fall

All those that try
Will fail in the end
They cant stand the pressure
Cracking under it
Breaking down, till there is no more

Having to stand on my own,
Support my self
Till the others return

Only they can stand with me
Only they can support me when i fall
They dont crack, dont break

They are solid
Something that doesnt move
Something that is stable
Someone that i cant burn

But until then i will just fall
But supporting my self
Trying not to fall
Even the fall is slow
Its a risk i dont want to take.

A risk to great
So i pull my own self up
Support the Support

The facade untouched
The doors locked up
The damage wont be seen

Its better that way
Just support the support
Try to stand.

Parents

I knew that my parents werent over this whole me being gay thing. My mom freaks out, and thinks that im going to gay clubs, getting drunk every night, doing drugs, and sleeping with all the guys at the club. None of which i do. Even tho i did promise to go with one of my straight friends to a gay club. But the main reason is cause she thinks i am going to slip into a depression again. Well true that it kinda sucks feeling alone, but i have so many other things going on that depression is one of the last things on my mind.

And as for my dad, i feel like i..... well i dont know. i guess i am a little depressed about that. But i talked to Joe, councilor/mentor, about it. and i have found out that i do need to do something about it, otherwise it will only hurt me down the road. So i have to, either cut him outta my life, change my dad from a father figure to a peer, or try to get him to be a father. Well im not sure if i want him outta my life right now, and if i try to have him as a peer, there is nothing there in him that i see in my peers, so he would be cut outta my life like that. So talking to him seems to be my best bet but i dont know how to do it. I dont want to make things worse. And i really dont know him well enough to be able to tell how he would react or what he would do. And yes i know "sometimes you have to take big risks to get big results" but i dont want to destroy my one and only chance i have at changing my relationship with my dad.

These are deff things that have been weighing very heavy on my mind the past few days. something that i will have to think about for a while i think.

Timing??? Not so good.

I swear my timing could not be any worse, i start somewhat falling for people. And the people that i cant have. Why the hell does that seem to always happen

One, named JC, (and yes im naming people now i guess) i have gotten to known better over the past year, and then i start to think that he is cute, bad thing is that it wont work, cant really write why but just wont, and the fact that he has a BF. Why do all the ones i kinda fall for have BF?

The other is Johny, i know him thru mutual friends, and we kinda know about each other, and i have thought that he was nice from the very start. But he isnt looking for anyone right now.

As for me, im not sure, dating, not dating. Really not sure about the whole thing right now. But there is still a month left before college starts back up again. Who knows maybe i will sort everything up by then.

The Future

So i have been think about the future, mainly about having a family down the road. At first i thought having just a max. of 3 kids would be more than enough. Now i kinda want a big family. As well i want to include my close friends as family. I want the kids to have many different adults in there life with many different backgrounds. So they always have someone to talk to and lean on in times of need. I think that would be a great family. As well as having the family around the world. Were they can go later in life and have people that i am close with look after them when i cant.

But enough of that, lets talk names.

So for Boys i have picked out
- Craig
- Rhys
- Ianto
- Connor
- Dante
- Owen
- Demetrius
- August
- Bento

And for Girls (they're just ok right now)
- Riley
- Ari
- Cheyenne
- Mckenzie
- Jacqueline
- Tegan
- Annaliese
- Lynn

So thats my family talk for now.

My Dad

Time to talk about my dad a bit

Well I would really like to be close with my dad, but it has never been like that. His main focus was work. He was gone by the time I woke up, and wasn’t really around much in the afternoon. It was like he didn’t care about me at all. And when I tried to help him out, I never once got a thank you, I only got how I screwed it up. It had gotten to the point where I really learned to just phase him out of my life. (yes I know that sounds bad) He wasn’t there growing up for me, so I learned to live without a Dad, and for a time I didn’t even think of him as Dad, even thou I kept calling him that. He was just another person living in my house. The person that didn’t abandon me once, but everyday that he left the house.

But as High School ended and I had written him out of my life, He turned around not wanted me to leave. He wanted to get to know me better. It was like a stranger walking in my life.

So it has been really hard the past two years, wanting to open up to him again, when all the time I thought things had changed only to get disappointed to see that wasn’t true. He says he felt bad that he didn’t get time to spend with me. But it seems like he had time, he just didn’t choose me. I want to be able to talk to him about anything. I want to talk to him about what I want to do with my life, The guys that I think are cute, problems that I am having growing up. Part of me doesn’t think he wants to hear them, or cares about that, and even that he might go back to ignoring me.

I don’t want things like that, at the same time all I have is bad memories of him and I. Nothing really great. And over the years I have tried to connect with him, going golfing, fishing, as well as so many other things. But still nothing. The only truly happy time that I have with him, is a picture, a picture that I cant remember at all, I was quite young. But there we are both happy, and he is smiling. Something I can never remember him ever doing, especially when I was around.

I want to be able to talk to him about, everyday life. But at the same time I don’t want to get hurt, or lose what I have gotten so far.

I just don’t know what to do.

Abandoned

It was like you abandoned me

From the very start

I was so small

And you just left me

Not once, but

Everyday

It was like you could look right thru me

I was just Air

Not even there

I tried to find you

But even when you where there

I still couldn’t find you

You were lost to me

A missing part of my life

One of the most important parts

The few times I did find you

I only wanted to run the other way

Run and hide

Torn in two, dreams and hopes broken

One of the only people who could break something

Something so great.

You probably thought

I would wait

Wait for you

See me there waiting for you to come back

I could only wait so long

So long before

I had to finish that chapter

And the next one

And the next

And you weren't in any of them

I had to write you out

Had to let you go

I finished that book

Nailed it shut

Then you turned around

Saw me for the first time

But to me you were a stranger

Someone that I never knew

I tried so had to pull the nails out of that book

And write you back in

But they wouldn’t give

And the ink had dried

And the pages were filled

Now I don’t know what to do

You are there

Wanting to be written back in

But im not sure how to

After all the times that I was let down

How do I write

Someone back in

Someone like that

Someone that brings back all the sad memories

Someone that I one have one happy memory

That of a picture that I have clung to

A picture that I don’t even remember

You were once lost

Time has pasted

I don’t know if its possible to go back

Back and rewrite the pages of my life

All cause you abandoned me

From the very start

Abandoned everyday

For twenty years

How can I go back that far

How do I write someone

Someone that was lost to me

Post Secret

Some post cards from Post Secret about being Gay. Some good, some bad, some controversial.

Missing Something?

It feels like i am missing something. Mainly like i want to be with someone.

But not just any one, its like i want a great guy, one who understands me, and is laid back.

I need an Ianto Jones

That would be great to have, someone like that.

Guess i will just have to wait for now.

Glad that i have many other things to keep me busy.


As for dating right now im in between wanting to and not wanting to. So i guess if you dont know just dont do anything. Hmmmm im not sure at all. Right now im too busy for that tho. Who knows what will happen down the road.

Numb

I walk around numb as can be

I feel nothing anymore

Everything is in a haze

A fog that never lifts

Its not that I have tried to change

I have, and I have nothing

Nothing to show

Nothing to have

Nothing to hold

Just nothing

It's a lost cause

The path is set

Nothing can be done to change it

Fate is far gone

Hope and Faith

Still for a better day

All I do

It try to is find my place

To be a warning

A step for those to weak

I push them closer

Closer as I fall further

In hopes to change just the right life

Still the numb kills everything

But when you are numb

You feel no pain

And when you have no pain

You are immortal

Able to be stronger than before

Able to fight longer

Able to stand against the winds

Able to be a rock for the others

Able to help them when they need it

So bring on the numb

I have nothing

Nothing except to help the others

The others that I still care for

Even when I numb

I reach out for them

Grab the by the hand

In only hopes to help them

If I can save them

While I go down on my own ship

It is worth it all

Worth every moment that I have to suffer in the end

To see that they have made it thru

While I am left to fend

The numb is not meant to save me

It is used to save others

And it only takes one to be equal

And the numb is so worth it

Date?

So i hung out with someone that i knew, and i know that he kinda likes me, and i was thinking, Mmmmmm i hope this really isnt a date.

Well turns out it kinda was, cause he insisted on paying for everything. (im not saying that was a bad thing). But still.

I wanted to catch up on things, and most of the night was just weird, and then after him paying for everything i knew that he didnt just want me to kick him to the curb and tell him goodbye. So i made out with him, and pretty much just wanted it to end, kept counting the minutes until i could say bye.

It just that he is a nice friend but not really anyone to date, that and i pretty much just used him for free ice cream, movie, and dinner. And the fact that i dont find him attractive.

And the biggest thing, i kinda already gave my heart away to my Ex, whom i think about quite a bit.

I did feel gross afterwards and kinda wanted to just get away. I just dont know about this whole dating thing. Maybe im just dating the wrong people. or maybe, most likely, im just not over my Ex.

Mixed Emotions

Well i just dont know what think, im soooo full of many emotions.

To catch everyone up, me and my ex are talking again, which is great, but still awkward. We only had three days to make up three months.

I do miss him, but at the same time im still hurt, and a bit bitter about everything from the very start. Right now i want to rebuild the friendship between us, and just take it one day at a time. But it just so confusing with everything swimming in my head. So i guess right now, just go one day at a time.

Hopefully something will become clear. Feels like im lost in thick fog right now.

Need some Relax Time.

So its the end of the year, and its stressful.

What would be great right now.
- Chocolate Shake.... or two
- A nice long hot bath/or hot tub time.
- Get all dressed up and go to a club, or a formal event
- Some nice cuddle time

All of those things would be great right now, but i think the only one that will happen is the Chocolate Shake. It sounds pretty good, and it will give me a break from school and projects.

Well im off to get my Chocolate Shake.

Update

Well its about time for an update.

So far the only thing is that "Flirt" has gone a little bit further, but i want to take things slow, since i dont want to hurt him right now. So i am slowing down, one cause he is pretty new to all of this, and two cause i dont want to hurt him.

So right now im just chilling. I have had some fun times, especially at some parties with close friends. And getting closer to even other friends.


::EDIT::

To You, (you know who you are)

I am not a raging alcoholic, and i am not going to become one, just cause i party every once in a while, doesnt mean shit. I can drink every few weeks and be fine. I think its you that should worry, drinking alone isnt good, at least drink with someone. And yes my friends do care about me. They make sure that i will be fine, and they know when i need to stop, and so do i. So please stop trying to control me thru other people, and just talk to me. No i prob wont tell you everything that is going on. Most likely cause you will freak out on me. But i will tell you what is generally happening. And why dont we work on building that friendship rather than you trying to pry into my life and control me.

Just a thought.

Tiger.

::EDIT::

Well thats about all for now, ill start talking more about whats, going on with people later.

Sorry if i dont post for a few weeks, i will try but i have been starting to get swamped with projects.

Well thats all for now bloggers.

God Hates Fags???

Part One





Part Two


It does seem like this group targets gays a lot. I feel like they are putting down people that are in sin. And this is something that i have experienced personally from people who ignored me cause of who i am. In this video one thing that was said was that we have to surround our self with other people like us, (filled with christ) yes this is good, but jesus also reached out to people that were looked down upon, and even when to their house and sat down with them and ate with them in there home. He took horrible people and did not push them away, hate them, look down upon them, and discriminate against them. He showed them by showing them with love what is possible. One other thing that i do not like that people have a attitude with the way they act, the way that some people will speak to you. It has the anger and hate that they get in this video.

I feel like even tho people might be the worst in the world that we should be able to be nice to them. I am not saying that i do not hate on others, yes it is hard, but with the right attitude and time people will see great things. And it would be great if people would not look down upon others like they do. It just takes the gap and widens it even more.

True the Westbro Church has some crazy people, and even when they do not know what they are fighting for at such a young age, and like they said in the video, that they really do not know everything. I say then how can you be so spiteful. take these things that you have learned show the world through your possitive actions. Yelling and Picketing are not possitive actions concerning this topic.

I say that you need to not put people out, cause they do not believe what you want them to, or are gay, or for any other reason. Just be nice, lower the hate, and be understanding, and if you do not understand ask people about what you do not understand. You may find out that the people you hate arent so bad after all, we are all made human after all.

Dating Round One

So i have started to get back out there. well at least im on the right path of things.

So far i have gotten one guy that i have made out with, i know a little bit about him. and would like to learn more about him. but it was nice to just flirt, cuddle, and make out with a nice looking guy. He is a little younger than i would like but right now its a start for things. So far some nice make out time is nice. He will be known as Couch Guy

And i just had someone else talk to me a little bit, and we more so flirted than anything. I know him, but havent really hung out with him that much. so i might have to change that to see how he is. And he will be known as Flirt Bi Guy

So who knows what will happen with all of this stuff.

But i am moving on, and trying to do the whole dating thing. and so far its starting out pretty well.