Date?

So i hung out with someone that i knew, and i know that he kinda likes me, and i was thinking, Mmmmmm i hope this really isnt a date.

Well turns out it kinda was, cause he insisted on paying for everything. (im not saying that was a bad thing). But still.

I wanted to catch up on things, and most of the night was just weird, and then after him paying for everything i knew that he didnt just want me to kick him to the curb and tell him goodbye. So i made out with him, and pretty much just wanted it to end, kept counting the minutes until i could say bye.

It just that he is a nice friend but not really anyone to date, that and i pretty much just used him for free ice cream, movie, and dinner. And the fact that i dont find him attractive.

And the biggest thing, i kinda already gave my heart away to my Ex, whom i think about quite a bit.

I did feel gross afterwards and kinda wanted to just get away. I just dont know about this whole dating thing. Maybe im just dating the wrong people. or maybe, most likely, im just not over my Ex.

Mixed Emotions

Well i just dont know what think, im soooo full of many emotions.

To catch everyone up, me and my ex are talking again, which is great, but still awkward. We only had three days to make up three months.

I do miss him, but at the same time im still hurt, and a bit bitter about everything from the very start. Right now i want to rebuild the friendship between us, and just take it one day at a time. But it just so confusing with everything swimming in my head. So i guess right now, just go one day at a time.

Hopefully something will become clear. Feels like im lost in thick fog right now.